“It turns out that, at social gatherings, as a source of entertainment, conviviality, and good fun, I rank somewhere between a sprig of parsley and a single ice-skate.”

There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.

The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man.

Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

Drink and dance and laugh and lie, Love, the reeling midnight through, For tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.)

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.

I don’t mind anything that’s written about me, as long as it’s not true.

If I didn’t care for fun and such, I’d probably amount to much. But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.

Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!

Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.

Women and elephants never forget.

People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.

If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them.

The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.

Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!

Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship.

Where unwilling dies the rose; buds the new another year.

I’ve actually gotten so I don’t associate television with entertainment very much.

I want to entertain people, but with some substance.

We must rediscover our faith in the future and join with one another to ensure that nonviolence is the prevalent choice for government, law enforcement, the non-profit sector, business, education, media, entertainment, arts, and for the global citizenry.

No one in my family had ever done anything acting-wise or entertainment industry-wise.

I figured, ‘Why not go into entertainment?’ I love entertaining people. I always loved being extra loud.

I be talking to females but nothing serious, just entertaining everybody.

I’m not here to judge Mike Tyson. I’m not here to judge nobody. I’m not here to monitor no other fighters. I respect him for what he did in the sport of boxing. He was an entertainer.

Boxing is a sport. We allow each other to hit each other, but I’m not treating my opponent like my enemy. We’re doing a job to entertain people.