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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.

Erma Bombeck

Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
ERMA BOMBECK

Evening Failure Feeling Goodness Misery Sun
Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
ERMA BOMBECK

Children Encouragement Independence Lose
No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.
ERMA BOMBECK

Bed Death Funny Motivation Sleep Women
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
ERMA BOMBECK

Courage Dream Kindness Yourself
There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
ERMA BOMBECK

Fun Funny Mother Water Wrong
Cats invented self-esteem.
ERMA BOMBECK

Animal Cat Invention Worth
I haven’t trusted polls since I read that 62% of women had affairs during their lunch hour. I’ve never met a woman in my life who would give up lunch for sex.
ERMA BOMBECK

Funny Give Up Myself See Sex Trust Woman
Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn’t turn it on.
ERMA BOMBECK

Children Ideas Light Myself Yourself
I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night.
ERMA BOMBECK

Fate Food Myself Night Oneself Thinking Woman
A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
ERMA BOMBECK

Family Fun Herself Mom Relationship Yourself
For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
ERMA BOMBECK

Husband Marriage Myself Vacation. Children
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
ERMA BOMBECK

Death Doctor Funny Humor Inspirational Plant
Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
ERMA BOMBECK

Children Funny Parents Reward Survive
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
ERMA BOMBECK

Home Ideas Myself See Work
Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.
ERMA BOMBECK

Home Result Stop Work
I read one psychologist’s theory that said, “Never strike a child in your anger.” When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he’s recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
ERMA BOMBECK

Angry Book Children Family Funny Hands Kiss Myself Reading Theory Yourself

Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.

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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.

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