“It isn’t what I do, but how I do it. It isn’t what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.”

Ladies who play with fire must remember that smoke gets in their eyes.

I’m no angel, but I’ve spread my wings a bit.

Dating means two things; disillusionment or a racing heart.

Don’t let a man put anything over on you except an umbrella.

The best way to learn to be a lady is to see how other ladies do it.

Too much of a good thing can be wonderful!

Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go everywhere.

When women go wrong, men go right after them.

A hard man is good to find.

Flattery will get you everywhere.

I’ll try anything once, twice if I like it, three times to make sure.

I only read biographies, metaphysics and psychology. I can dream up my own fiction.

The best way to behave is to misbehave.

Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present.

Give a man free hands, and you’ll know where to find them.

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald but if he has fire, women will like him.

Look like barbie, Smoke like marley.

Do you mind if I don’t smoke?

The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.

If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

Pirate was going to be my middle name, but then my uncle had a problem with it because pirates are bad.

I make my protein drink with whiskey. People think I’m crazy, but that’s the way I am. I get stoned, I do my own thing.

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.

The reason fat men are good natured is they can neither fight nor run.