I am going to dedicate myself, full time, to my day-drinking.
TINA FEYThomas Jefferson-another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me. This was my problem in a nutshell. To get some play in Charlottesville, you had to be either a Martha Jefferson or a Sally Hemings.
More Tina Fey Quotes
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Sometimes if you have a difficult decisin to make, just stall until the answer presents itself.
TINA FEY -
This week, penny collector Gene Sukie went to the bank and cashed in ten thousand pounds of pennies he had collected over 34 years, which were worth over fourteen thousand dollars. And, of course, I was in line behind him.
TINA FEY -
Just say yes and you’ll figure it out afterwards.
TINA FEY -
I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Joseph and Mary did – Traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there.
TINA FEY -
Nothing is creepier than a bunch of adults being very quiet.
TINA FEY -
Thomas Jefferson-another gorgeous white boy who would not have been interested in me. This was my problem in a nutshell. To get some play in Charlottesville, you had to be either a Martha Jefferson or a Sally Hemings.
TINA FEY -
I can’t possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody’s business and I’ll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life.
TINA FEY -
You’re not in competition with other women. You’re in competition with everyone.
TINA FEY -
To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
TINA FEY -
If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?”
TINA FEY -
(My proudest moment as a child was the time I beat my uncle Pierre at Scrabble with the seven-letter word FARTING.)
TINA FEY -
Some people say, “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.
TINA FEY -
Life is improvisation.
TINA FEY -
There are a couple of things I want to impart to ladies who want to be in comedy: One, you don’t have to be weird or be quirky to get your job done. And two, comedy skill is not sexually transmittable.
TINA FEY -
I want to thank my parents for somehow raising me to have confidence that is disproportionate with my looks and abilities.
TINA FEY