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They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

Shaquille O'Neal

I’m going back to the old Shaq. I was normal last year – I was an earthling last summer. I had to go back to my alien roots.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Alien Back Eating Go Going Last Normal Old Person Root Summer Year
If you take a needle and stick her in the booty and take a needle and stick me in the booty, we’re both going to say ouch.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Body Both Needle Ouch Say Stick Take
I urge all children to listen to their mothers and fathers. My mom was helping out some kids and she didn’t want to call me for all of the money; she only wanted to take care of some of the kids.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Children Father Listen Mother Urge
Every challenge you put in front of me, I’ve handled it, dismantled it – ate them, dropped them off in the bathroom and flushed them away.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Away Bathroom Challenge Dismantle Drop Every Flush Front
I never make a face when they try to flagrant or hack-a-Shaq me, because I’m not from this planet. Earthlings don’t faze me.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Country Earthling Face Faze Flagrant Make never Person Planet
It was a weird game. There was ugly shooting and a lot of turnovers and mistakes, and we were just fortunate to get the win.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Basketball Fortunate Game Lot Mistake Shoot Turnover Ugly Weird Win
I just want everyone to know I’m suing Ruben Studdard. He had his hand on my ass and he wouldn’t let go.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Ass Basketball Everyone Go Hand Just Know Let Want
Yeah, D-Wade called me up last night and said that he saw some film of me in high school and thinks that my form then was better and that I should shoot like that.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Better Call Country Film Last Night People Person School Shoot Some Think
They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Always Bagel Ball Come Early Eat Microwave Moming Shot Stay
My secret? See it, and stay focused on it.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Focus Secret Stay
There was a kid that had five brothers and sisters, and the family was missing for like five days. I was watching TV, they [found each other] and now they’re in San Antonio. So I bought them a little apartment in San Antonio. But I’m doing stuff like that all over.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Basketball Brother Day Family Five Kid Miss Sister Television Watch
I really get motivated when I have doubters.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Doubter Get Motivate Really
He’s the president. I’m the general. Unless I want to get impeached, I got to do what he says.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Do General Get Impeach President Say Unless Want What
A pinch is a pinch. If you pinch my right nipple, I’m going to say, ‘ouch.’ If I pinch your right nipple, you’re going to say ‘ouch.’ A foul is a foul and a flagrant is a flagrant.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Basketball Go Nipple Ouch Pinch Right Say
Stay out of the gentlemen’s clubs. Get a lot of rest. Just have fun and relax and stay focused.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Club Focus Fun Gentleman Lot Relax Rest Stay Sty
Y’all reporters like my quotes, don’t you. Yeah, my quotes are Shaqalicious.
SHAQUILLE O'NEAL

Country Like People Person Place Quote Reporter Yeah

They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

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They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn’t always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

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Popular Authors

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