“It’s better to get out before you reach the sell-by date.”

As so often happens, I discover that it would have been better to keep my mouth shut.

Human population growth is probably the single most serious long-term threat to survival.

A gun is no more dangerous than a cricket bat in the hands of a madman.

If I were reincarnated I would wish to be returned to Earth as a killer virus to lower human population levels.

I have frequently been misrepresented. I don’t hate the press; I find a lot of it is very unpalatable.

British women can’t cook.

It’s a pleasure to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.

The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined.

Everything that wasn’t invented by God is invented by an engineer.

Dontopedalogy is the science of opening your mouth and putting your foot in it, which I’ve practised for many years.

All money nowadays seems to be produced with a natural homing instinct for the Treasury.

We live in what virtually amounts to a museum – which does not happen to a lot of people.

I had been playing polo, and I decided to give up at the age of 50.

Wildlife of the world is disappearing, not because of a malicious and deliberate policy of slaughter and extermination, but simply because of a general and widespread ignorance and neglect.

Anyone who is concerned about his dignity would be well advised to keep away from horses.

Young people are the same as they always were. They are just as ignorant.

I am a philosopher, not a scientist, and we philosophers are better at questions than answers.

There are some things that, if you say them out loud, will hurt the other person’s feelings. I tend to say them anyway. It’s better to be honest.

I think the only thing that I really thought about, I am always every year thinking about how I can get better, how my stuff can get better, how our team can improve.

Talk with your daughters, Play with your sons. You need to be a better friend to them than anyone else. This society offers lots of evil friends. Before they make those kinds of friends, they need to find their best friend in you.

I have one reason why you should walk away from that temptation right now. One reason: God. Is. Better.

It’s better to have died a small child than to be a politician who gets caught in a scandal during a slow news month.

It is better to be silent and be real than to talk and not be real.

I wish I had a better metabolism. But someone else probably wishes they could walk into a room and make friends with everyone like I can. You always want what someone else has.