The idea of a stag hunt evokes chivalry – knights in jerkins and hose, ladies on sidesaddles with wimples and billowing dresses, a white stag symbolizing something-or-other, and Robin Hood getting in the way. An actual stag hunt is more like a horseback meeting of a county planning commission.
P. J. O'ROURKEWhen elites see a homeless person in the gutter, they assume he’s saving a parking place.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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A fundamental American question is, ‘What’s the big idea?’
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There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.
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The budget doesn’t have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn’t have much control over the budget.
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Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.
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When I’m in the car, I want the only one shouting to be me.
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There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as ‘caring’ and ‘sensitive’ because he wants to expand the government’s charitable programs is merely saying that he’s willing to try to do good with other people’s money.
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The good news is that, according to the Obama administration, the rich will pay for everything. The bad news is that, according to the Obama administration, you’re rich.
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Woodstock had a tremendous impact on American artistic life.
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Never wear anything that panics the cat.
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No humorist is under any obligation to provide answers and probably if you were to delve into the literary history of humour it’s probably all about not providing answers because the humorist essentially says: this is the way things are.
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We need a government, alas, because of the nature of humans.
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Political leaders are expert at saying nothing.
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Will Generation X and the Millennials do a better job running the world than the boomers have? Let’s hope so.
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There is no horizon in Toledo. There are too many trees.
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Every vote should carry a serial number, so that responsibility for harmful or careless use of the vote can be traced. Concealed voting should be outlawed.
P. J. O'ROURKE