You can’t destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America’s elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and about half the time, you’re doing us a favor.
P. J. O'ROURKEIn our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Southern California is a nice place, if you could cut out the show-business cancer. It just keeps spreading.
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The people who despise America are the editors of the ‘New Statesman.’ Their green-card applications must have been turned down.
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Will Generation X and the Millennials do a better job running the world than the boomers have? Let’s hope so.
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Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
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Stupid is a great force in human affairs.
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Politics is the attempt to achieve power and prestige without merit.
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My dad died when I was young; my mom remarried with more haste than sense to a fellow… he wasn’t evil or anything, but he was worthless.
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Gay marriage acceptance is happening in the blink of an eye.
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Head lice have their own animal-rights group, or may as well. The National Pediculosis Association doesn’t exactly advocate letting lice live with dignity, but it does oppose pediculicidal treatments.
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When I’m in the car, I want the only one shouting to be me.
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The Afghans themselves say that if you put two Afghans in a room, you get three factions.
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They are just really stupid people in Hollywood. You write them a script, and they say they love it, they absolutely love it. Then they say, ‘But doesn’t it need a small dog, and an Eskimo, and shouldn’t it be set in New Guinea?’ And you say, ‘But it is a sophisticated romantic comedy set in Paris.’
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I rarely meet a politician that I don’t like personally. They are generally well endowed with charm. Therein lies the danger.
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Don’t send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.
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People will tell you anything but what they do is always the truth.
P. J. O'ROURKE