Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.
LILY TOMLINDid you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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In the depths of the night, fear grips my heart. It paralyzes my mind. But most of all, I feel very, very alone
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Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
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Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world.
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There’s so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
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Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.
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What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.
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When I’ve had a meltdown, people will say to me, “Well, you failed to keep your sense of humor.”
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If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
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Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
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If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
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Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
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We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.
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To me, “sexual freedom” means freedom from having to have sex.
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I feel some part of me can wake up and be very existential and the next day wake up and be sort of in love with the universe.
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If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.
LILY TOMLIN