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Be glad you’re even alive. Be furious you’re going to die.

Joseph Heller

From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
JOSEPH HELLER

Goodness History Moral Teaching
Men went mad and were rewarded with medals.
JOSEPH HELLER

Deep Mad Medal Men Reward
I’ve only had four ideas for a novel in my life, and I’ve written all of them.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ideas Life Novel Writing
When people disagreed with him he urged them to be objective.
JOSEPH HELLER

Disagree Objective Urge
Insanity is contagious.
JOSEPH HELLER

Contagious Insane One Liner
Every writer I know has trouble writing.
JOSEPH HELLER

Trouble Writer Writing
I don’t believe in miracles because it’s been a long time since we’ve had any.
JOSEPH HELLER

Broken Heart Miracle Time
The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren’t paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you.
JOSEPH HELLER

Ignorance Law Mind Nature Paranoid Promote
What do you do when it rains?” The captain answered frankly. “I get wet.
JOSEPH HELLER

Rain Wet
There is no disappointment so numbing as someone no better than you achieving more.
JOSEPH HELLER

Achievement Disappointment Numb
The enemy is anybody who’s going to get you killed, no matter which side he is on.
JOSEPH HELLER

Enemy Kill War
Let’s take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.
JOSEPH HELLER

Drive Live Packet
I’m not running away from my responsibilities. I’m running to them. There’s nothing negative about running away to save my life.
JOSEPH HELLER

Life Negative Responsiblity Run Save
Never quit a job as a matter of principle. You’ll always regret it.
JOSEPH HELLER

Job Principle Quit Regret
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it’s going your way. When it isn’t, don’t call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
JOSEPH HELLER

Acceptance Bad Luck Destiny Injustice
In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
JOSEPH HELLER

Accident Failure Predict

Be glad you’re even alive. Be furious you’re going to die.

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Be glad you’re even alive. Be furious you’re going to die.

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