Therapists need to have a long experience in personal therapy to see what it’s like to be on the other side of the couch and see what they find helpful or not helpful. And if possible, get into therapy at different stages of their life with different kinds of therapists just to sample a bit.
IRVIN D. YALOMLife is a miserable thing. I have decided to spend my life thinking about it.
More Irvin D. Yalom Quotes
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The act of revealing oneself fully to another and still being accepted may be the major vehicle of therapeutic help.
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Death, however, does itch. It itches all the time. It is always with us, scratching at some inner door.
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Every person must choose how much truth he can stand.
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If one is to learn to live with the dead, one must first learn to live with the living!
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The drive for power is not uncommonly motivated by this dynamic. One’s own fear and sense of limitation is avoided by enlarging oneself and one’s sphere of control.
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All these things I’ve written so much about. That’s why I’ve made such a practice really, over and over to hammer home the point of self-revelation and being more of yourself and showing yourself. Every book I write I want to get that in there.
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There are borderlines and there are borderlines. Labels do violence to people. You can’t treat the label; you have to treat the person behind the label. (17)
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I thought a lot about how someone very old is the last living individual to have known some person or cluster of people.
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A curious thought experiment. . . Nietzsche’s message to us was to live life in such a way that we would be willing to repeat the same life eternally
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Death anxiety is the mother of all religions, which, in one way or another, attempt to temper the anguish of our finitude.
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We project ourselves into the future through our children; we grow rich, famous, ever larger; we develop compulsive protective rituals; or we embrace an impregnable belief in an ultimate rescuer.
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I never want to take away something when I don’t have anything better to offer him in a way.
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To love means to be actively concerned for the life and the growth of another.
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This was due to a kind of increased existential awareness that resulted from this confrontation with the death of another. And I think it brought them in touch with their own death, so they began to experience a kind of preciousness to life that comes with an experience of its transiency.
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If I’m among men who don’t agree at all with my nature, I will hardly be able to accommodate myself to them without greatly changing myself.
IRVIN D. YALOM