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What? ‘Borderline patients play games’? That what you said? Ernest, you’ll never be a real therapist if you think like that. That’s exactly what I meant earlier when I talked about the dangers of diagnosis.

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If one is to learn to live with the dead, one must first learn to live with the living!
IRVIN D. YALOM

Death First Learn Live Living Must One
All these things I’ve written so much about. That’s why I’ve made such a practice really, over and over to hammer home the point of self-revelation and being more of yourself and showing yourself. Every book I write I want to get that in there.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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The more unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety.
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Live right, he reminded himself, and have faith that good things will flow from you even if you never learn of them.
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The therapist can make the group feel safer by allowing each patient to set his or her limits and by emphasizing the patient’s control over every interaction.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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One comprehends oneself in order not to be preoccupied with oneself.
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If I had to pick out a therapist in a movie that I’d like to go see as a personal therapist, it would be Robin Williams in Goodwill Hunting.
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I must stop him from being one of those who call themselves good because they have no claws.
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When people don’t have any curiosity about themselves, that is always a bad sign.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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…the more unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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I dream of a love that is more than two people craving to possess one another.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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Therapists need to have a long experience in personal therapy to see what it’s like to be on the other side of the couch and see what they find helpful or not helpful. And if possible, get into therapy at different stages of their life with different kinds of therapists just to sample a bit.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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I think we ripple on into others, just like a stone puts its ripples into a brook. That, for me, too, is a source of comfort. It kind of, in a sense, negates the sense of total oblivion.
IRVIN D. YALOM

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Just as you were about to step on it, I asked you “Do you want to cross the footbridge to me?” – Immediately you did not want to anymore; and when I asked you again you remained silent.
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Again Anymore Footbridge Immediately Remind Silent Step Want
The act of revealing oneself fully to another and still being accepted may be the major vehicle of therapeutic help.
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And if you do the latter, you’re not so worried about the everyday trivialities of life, for example, petty concerns about secrecy or privacy.
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