Some piece of ourselves, not necessarily our consciousness, but some piece of ourselves gets passed on and on and on.
IRVIN D. YALOMIn a study we did of bereavement, we found that rather impressive numbers of widows and widowers had not simply gone back to their pre-loss functioning, but grown.
More Irvin D. Yalom Quotes
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If you want to choose the pleasure of growth, prepare yourself for some pain.
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The drive for power is not uncommonly motivated by this dynamic. One’s own fear and sense of limitation is avoided by enlarging oneself and one’s sphere of control.
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Life is a spark between two identical voids, the darkness before birth and the one after death.
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Your greatest instrument is you, yourself, and the work of self-understanding is endless. I’m still learning.
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Does a being who requires meaning find meaning in a universe that has no meaning?
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If people in their 20s had more death awareness, would that in fact temper their ambition or drive?
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Mature love is loving, not being loved.
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Therapists need to have a long experience in personal therapy to see what it’s like to be on the other side of the couch and see what they find helpful or not helpful. And if possible, get into therapy at different stages of their life with different kinds of therapists just to sample a bit.
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The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.
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Never take away anything if you have nothing better to offer
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One reason patients are reluctant to work in a therapy group is they fear that things will go too far, that the powerful therapist or the collective group might coerce them to lose control–to say or think or feel things that will be catastrophic.
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You know, I think everybody I’ve seen has come from some other therapy, and almost invariably it’s very much the same thing: the therapist is too disinterested, a little too aloof, a little too inactive. They’re not really interested in the person, he doesn’t relate to the person.
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We project ourselves into the future through our children; we grow rich, famous, ever larger; we develop compulsive protective rituals; or we embrace an impregnable belief in an ultimate rescuer.
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Though the physicality of death destroys us, the idea of death may save us.
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Some have expressed the very opposite feeling–the fear that they would not be interesting enough to write about.
IRVIN D. YALOM






