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Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.

Henry Cloud

The mature person meets the demands of life, while the immature person demands that life meet her demands.
HENRY CLOUD

Demand Life Mature Person
Marriage is not slavery. It is based on a love relationship deeply rooted in freedom. Each partner is free from the other and therefore free to love the other. Where there is control, or perception of control, there is not love. Love only exists where there is freedom.
HENRY CLOUD

Control Freedom Love Marriage Partner Relationship Slave
Independence is not an option for us. Remember, God existed without us.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
If you are building a culture where honest expectations are communicated and peer accountability is the norm, then the group will address poor performance and attitudes.
HENRY CLOUD

Attitude Build Communication Culture Expectation Honesty Performance
The extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues is a critical marker of the soundness of a relationship.
HENRY CLOUD

Criticism Issues People Relationship Sound
People tend to look at dating sort of like a safari – like they’re trying to land the trophy.
HENRY CLOUD

Award Date People Perspective Relationship
To get greater than 100% return on a growth step, give up defensiveness. Defensiveness stifles performance, and destroys relationships.
HENRY CLOUD

Destroy Greatness Performance Relationship Return
You have to be able to face losing some things you might want in order to be free to do the right thing.
HENRY CLOUD

Face Freedom Lose Order Right
We need rest not just so we feel better. We need rest for actual creation of what we’re going to need the next day.
HENRY CLOUD

Better Creation Day Feeling Need
Anger is frustration at the fact that we are not God, and do not have control over reality.
HENRY CLOUD

Angry Control Fact Frustration Ourselves Reality
I’m not an expert in the sociological realities of all the pastors in the world, but I would say that there are some very, very positive things about the state of integrity in church leaders.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
Diligence is not easy, but we can’t reach our goals without it.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
Endings are a part of life, and we are actually wired to execute them. But because of trauma, developmental failures, and other reasons, we shy away from the steps that could open up whole new worlds of development and growth.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.
HENRY CLOUD

Community Group Health People Surround Yourself
Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen.
HENRY CLOUD

Date Discover Finding Yourself
You aren’t alive if you aren’t in need.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
A leader’s responsibility is to cause a vision and mission to have tangible results in the real world.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
When you encourage someone, it literally changes their brain chemistry to be able to perform, sends fuel to the brain.
HENRY CLOUD

Brain Change Encourage Performance Yourself
Successful people stick to what they are good at and find ways to make that larger.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
Couples often live out years of falsehood trying to protect and save a relationship, all the while destroying any chance of real relationship.
HENRY CLOUD

Chance Couple Destroy Fake Live Reality Relationship
Faith goes beyond reason. It goes beyond what you can see. But it is as real as anything you can touch or feel.
HENRY CLOUD

Beyond Faith Feeling Reason Touch
The opposite of bad is not good.The opposite of bad is love
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word ‘no.’ Love respects ‘no,’ control does not.
HENRY CLOUD

Control Goodness Person Reaction Relationship Respond Test
For someone’s character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.
HENRY CLOUD

Character Children Criticism Freedom Growth Life Stop
One of the worst things you can die with is potential.
HENRY CLOUD

Death Oneself Potential Worst
Just as we leave the effects of our work behind in results, we leave the effects of our interactions with people in their hearts, minds, and souls.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur

Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.

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Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.

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