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Erma Bombeck Quote - My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

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Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
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As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
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Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.
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Pregnancy is the only time in a woman’s life she can help God work a miracle.
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How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
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It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.
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Never have more children than you have car windows.
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Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
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Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
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One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.
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Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
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