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I don’t think anyone ever gets over the surprise of how differently one audience’s reaction is from another.

Dick Cavett

A biggest mistake I made when I started doing a talk show was I thought you had to read the books.
DICK CAVETT

Big Book Mistake Reading Start Yourself
I don’t feel old. I feel like a young man that has something wrong with him.
DICK CAVETT

Feeling Himself Man Old Wrong Young
I am always shocked that there are still a handful of defenders of the dubious practice of abstinence, surely the worst idea since chocolate-covered ants.
DICK CAVETT

Chocolate Hands Ideas Myself Practice Shock Worst
Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them.
DICK CAVETT

Hard Work Lawyer Ourselves
I don’t see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty – and evaporating quickly.
DICK CAVETT

Bright Empty Evaporate Future Language Myself Quick
I feel sorry for the poor kids whose parents feel they’re qualified to teach them at home. Of course, some parents are smarter than some teachers, but in the main I see home-schooling as misguided foolishness.
DICK CAVETT

Children Feeling Fools Guide Home Parents Poor Smart
Just think of all the billions of coincidences that don’t happen.
DICK CAVETT

Chance Coincidence Thinking
I always wanted to live in a haunted house.
DICK CAVETT

Haunt Home Live Myself
Why are sex and violence always linked? I’m afraid they’ll blur together in people’s minds – sexandviolence – until we can’t tell them apart. I expect to hear a newscaster say, “The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.”
DICK CAVETT

Afraid Mindset Myself People Police Sex Violence
I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn’t include someone the size of the Hindenburg.
DICK CAVETT

Comic Myself See Show Stand
It was at a vividly bad time in Norman Mailer’s life that I met him, and a sort of water-treading time in mine. He had stabbed his wife, and I was a copy boy at Time magazine.
DICK CAVETT

Bad Life Magazine Time Wife
The authority of depression is horrifying. I felt like my brain was busted and that I could never feel good again. I really thought that I was never gonna heal.
DICK CAVETT

Authority Depression Feeling Horrible
Every student of comedy should see Dame Edna at least twice.
DICK CAVETT

Comedy See Student
I have never been converted to or even had much interest in spiritualism, occultism, Swedenborgianism or any particular religion. And I never, except occasionally for a laugh, visit the quacks who call themselves psychics.
DICK CAVETT

Call Exception Interest Laughter Myself Religion
Anything seen on TV is, in a subtle and sinister sense, thereby endorsed.
DICK CAVETT

Promotion See Subtle
My dream was maybe someday, one night I can be a guest on a talk show, and then I will have achieved everything I want.
DICK CAVETT

Achievement Dreams Myself Night Someday

I don’t think anyone ever gets over the surprise of how differently one audience’s reaction is from another.

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I don’t think anyone ever gets over the surprise of how differently one audience’s reaction is from another.

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