My father told me ‘Name your price in the beginning. If it ever gets more expensive than the price you name, get out of there.’
DAVE CHAPPELLEWeed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
More Dave Chappelle Quotes
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The mark of greatness is when everything before you is obsolete, and everything after you bears your mark.
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You got to be careful of the company you keep.
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The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive.
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It seems like there’s never enough famous white people among comic in Hollywood.
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I have a very good life, a high quality of life. I have both money and time. No one has that.
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The kid is the best thing that ever happened to me.
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I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
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Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.
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I get a little heated when I talk about the past. But I wanted to be clear – I’m not mad at anybody – not anymore.
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No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it.
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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.
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I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.
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I was doing sketches that were funny but socially irresponsible. I felt I was deliberately being encouraged and I was overwhelmed.
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They do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
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I felt in a lot of instances I was deliberately being put through stress because when you’re a guy who generates money, people have a vested interest in controlling you.
DAVE CHAPPELLE






