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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

Dave Chappelle

I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Black Man Myself Thinking
Comedians by and large are some of the most sensitive people on earth. Even if they’re socially callous.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Earth People Sensitive Social
I have a very good life, a high quality of life. I have both money and time. No one has that.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Goodness Life Money Oneself Time
Ralph Nader has slavery reparations on his platform, which makes me think he’s not serious. If he thought he could win he wouldn’t even say that.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Himself Platform Reparation Serious Slave Thinking Win
Being famous is great, it’s not like bad or horrible or anything.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Fame Greatness Horrible
I started when I was 14. I figured out that’s what I wanted to do when I was 14. Even when I was six, I can remember people telling me, “You’re gonna be a comedian,” and all this stuff.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Myself People Remember Start
I don’t want the money. I don’t want the drama. I just want to do my show. I want to have fun again.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Drama Fun Money Myself Show
Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Function Smoking Substance Yourself
They do what they do for money – that’s all. I don’t even know why you’re listening to me. I’ve done commercials for both Coke and Pepsi. Truth is, I can’t even taste the difference, but Pepsi paid me last, so there it is.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Commercial Difference Listening Money Myself Pay Taste
Something about New York, man: You can do more comedy there probably than you can anywhere in the world. If you’re interested in being funny, New York is the place to go.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Interest Place World Yourself
I’m famous today. People like me today. Might not like me tomorrow. You can’t count on it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Change Count Day Future Myself People
You know, be able to do something great in your life, you’re gonna have to realize your failures. You’re gonna have to embrace them and figure out how to overcome it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Failure Greatness Life Mark Realization Yourself
The world can’t tell you who you are. You’ve just got to figure out who you are and be there, for better or worse.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Better Personality World Worst Yourself
I have all these weird fantasies. Going coast-to-coast on my motorcycle and having random barbecues all over America. No show, no nothing.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Fantasy Myself
The only way you can know where the line is, is if you cross it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Boundary Limitation Yourself
No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Answer Children Hands Old Phone Yourself

I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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