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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

Dave Chappelle

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Answer Children Hands Old Phone Yourself
I started when I was 14. I figured out that’s what I wanted to do when I was 14. Even when I was six, I can remember people telling me, “You’re gonna be a comedian,” and all this stuff.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Comedy Myself People Remember Start
Weed’s not as bad as everything else… ’cause weed is a background substance. You know what I mean, you can smoke some herb and still function. You ain’t crisp… but you’ll function.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Function Smoking Substance Yourself
You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Old People Right Yourself
I have all these weird fantasies. Going coast-to-coast on my motorcycle and having random barbecues all over America. No show, no nothing.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Fantasy Myself
I support anyone’s right to be who they want to be. My question is: to what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Image Participate Question Right Support Yourself
Once you been performing on the streets you can conquer any venue.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Conquer Performance Street Venue
I have angst in my life, but I’m like anybody. We all have angst in our lives that we pick up and fidget with and then we put down and look at some other things that make us feel good or enjoy our lives.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Enjoyment Feeling Goodness Life Live Ourselves
You know, be able to do something great in your life, you’re gonna have to realize your failures. You’re gonna have to embrace them and figure out how to overcome it.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Failure Greatness Life Mark Realization Yourself
If you don’t have the right people around you and you’re moving at a million miles an hour you can lose yourself.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Lose People Right Yourself
I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Bad Country God Hope Land Myself Swear
The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive. “I don’t understand this person. So they’re crazy.” That’s bullshit. These people are not crazy. They strong people. Maybe their environment is a little sick.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Call Crazy People Strong Worst
The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Angry Himself Mindset People Position
I get a little heated when I talk about the past. But I wanted to be clear – I’m not mad at anybody – not anymore.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Angry Mad Myself Past Talk
I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Goodness Life Marriage Style
Stand-up is the kind of gig that’ll show you where you’re at.
DAVE CHAPPELLE

Kind Stand Yourself

I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

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I don’t want anything bad to happen to the United States, but if North Korea ever drops a nuclear bomb on this country, I swear to God, I hope it lands in Hartford.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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