“Listen, here it is: Technically, I never quit. I’m seven years late for work.”

I get a little heated when I talk about the past. But I wanted to be clear – I’m not mad at anybody – not anymore.

The worst thing to call somebody is crazy. It’s dismissive.

All white people talk about when they get high is other times that they got high.

The kid is the best thing that ever happened to me.

Money is the fuel for choices. Money gives me choices, so it’s not nothing, it’s something. But it’s not the end all, be all. There are other things in my life that I did not purchase with money that are very valuable.

Comedy is a very approval-oriented field.

People don’t know what it’s like standing up there onstage, when you have a wall of people smiling at you.

The world can’t tell you who you are. You’ve just got to figure out who you are and be there, for better or worse.

I don’t want the money. I don’t want the drama. I just want to do my show. I want to have fun again.

I love the fact that I have a show where you can run over a kid and everyone busts out laughing.

I started when I was 14. I figured out that’s what I wanted to do when I was 14. Even when I was six, I can remember people telling me, “You’re gonna be a comedian,” and all this stuff.

I got married recently. So far, so good. Less sex than I expected, but other than that, it’s a pretty good lifestyle.

I support anyone’s right to be who they want to be. My question is: to what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?

When I’m on stage, I get real happy there. Maybe that’s the only time in my adult life I feel like myself.

Comedians by and large are some of the most sensitive people on earth. Even if they’re socially callous.

You got to be careful of the company you keep.

It’s not too late for us to make a difference.

How did it get so late so soon? Its night before its afternoon. December is here before its June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon?

My father used to say that it’s never too late to do anything you wanted to do. And he said, ‘You never know what you can accomplish until you try.

You shall learn, though late, the lesson of how to be discreet.

Better late than never but never late is better. They tell me time is money well we’ll spend it together.

I’ve learned that love is not possessive and I’ve learned that love won’t wait. Now I’ve learned that love needs expression, but I learned too late.

If you are five minutes early, you are already ten minutes late.

It is never too late to learn what is always necessary to know.