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I was a left-handed dentist who made people cry.

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Oldtimers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they’re successful.
CASEY STENGEL

Airplane Alike Away Landing Olmsted Successful Weekend
No baseball pitcher would be worth a darn without a catcher who could handle the hot fastball.
CASEY STENGEL

Baseball Else Hit Home No Paid Pitcher Run Someone
They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that ones who drink milkshakes don’t win many ball games.
CASEY STENGEL

Ball Drink Found Game Many Milkshake One Say Some Star Whiskey
All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
CASEY STENGEL

According All Alphabetics Everyone Height Right
If I’ve got a good pinch-hitter, I hate to have him stay on the bench with men on the bases in an early inning. He may end the game right there.
CASEY STENGEL

Base Bench Early End Game Good Got Hate Hiter Inning Men Pinch Right Stay
I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don’t drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren’t speaking and I said I’ll take that drink.
CASEY STENGEL

Ask Came Drink Fella Hear Here People Speak Take You
I don’t like them fellas who drive in two runs and let in three.
CASEY STENGEL

Drive Fellas Let Like Run Them Three Two
I got players with bad watches – they can’t tell midnight from noon.
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Bad From Got Midnight Noon Player Tell Watch
Without losers, where would the winners be?
CASEY STENGEL

Be Loser Where Winner Without Would
Everybody line up alphabetically according to your height.
CASEY STENGEL

According Alphabetically Everybody Height Line Up
The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn’t argue with one. I’d put my arms around her and give her a little kiss.
CASEY STENGEL

Argue Arm Kiss Little One Put Trouble Umpire Women
Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It’s staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.
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Baseball Hurt Look Night Player Professional Stay Woman
The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It’s that they stay out all night looking for it.
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All Before Game Have Look Night Out Player Sex Stay Trouble
Managing is getting paid for home runs that someone else hits.
CASEY STENGEL

Else Get Hit Home Manage Paid Someone
I don’t know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.
CASEY STENGEL

Ball Know Spit Spitball Sure Throw
I was not successful as a ball player, as it was a game of skill.
CASEY STENGEL

Ball Game Player Skill Successful

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