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One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

Brendan Behan

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Judging Said Umpires
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles … it takes your mind off the cost of living.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cost General Living Mind War
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
God forgive us-but most of us grew up to be the sort of men our mothers warned us against.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Family Forgive Men Mother
Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
In a society which really supported marriage the wife would be encouraged to go to the office and make love to her husband on the company’s time and with its blessing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Blessing Husband Marriage
I saw a notice that said “Drink Canada Dry” and I’ve just started.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Drinking Food
I ruined my health drinking to other people’s.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinking People Ruined
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World

One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

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One drink is to many for me and a thousand not enough.

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