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Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.

Brendan Behan

There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Funny Irish People Spiritual
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Summer Winter
I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It’d depend whose life.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Capital Crime Imagine Punishment
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
A man is fortunate if he encounters living examples of vice, as well as of virtue, to inspire him.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Inspire Men Role Models
God forgive us-but most of us grew up to be the sort of men our mothers warned us against.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Family Forgive Men Mother
I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinkers Problem Writing
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison
Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation.
BRENDAN BEHAN

People Talking Way
That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Humor Mother
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Friendship Hurt Writing

Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.

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Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.

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Popular Authors

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