I never felt like I was stealing anyone’s fans as much as I was introducing some younger people to comedy who will eventually find tons of other comedians that they love.
BO BURNHAMI got a safe full of cherries ’cause I pop it and lock it.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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If I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I’d still say no.
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How old is too old to stop believing in, like, the tooth fairy? Like 12? I’ve got a cousin who is 18… Yeah, still believes in gay marriage.
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Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
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I never said I was funny, OK, so stop staring at me.
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I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
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I got a safe full of cherries ’cause I pop it and lock it.
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I’m not a grown up until everybody realises I’m a grown up. When everyone remembers me as the dirty kid singing little songs I am the dirty little kid.
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All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
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When life gets you down, make a comforter!
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I love you just the way you are but you don’t see you like I do. You shouldn’t try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.
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Poetic talent is really easy to fake when thy sentences doth no f-king sense make.
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Women are like fingers and toes because they’re easy to count on.
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The thing is, I was on YouTube like the golden era, I think. Before ads came in, it was really cool back then.
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I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
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I think comedy has a range, with multiple peaks in different areas. It’s like trying to compare Beethoven and the Beatles. Sometimes I hear from people, ‘I think you try too hard in your comedy.’ And that’s what I worry about.
BO BURNHAM