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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.

Bo Burnham

Women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don’t.
BO BURNHAM

Comedy Funny Humor Women
I thought I wanted to be a physicist in high school until I learned that there was much more math than philosophy in it. I assumed I would just sit around all day and think.
BO BURNHAM

Math Philosophy School
I get more ass than a giant donkey stable.
BO BURNHAM

Donkey Funny Giants Humor
I love you like a gay geneticist loves designer genes.
BO BURNHAM

Designer Funny Humor Love You
Quotes are for dumb people who can’t think of something intelligent to say on their own.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor Intelligent
I just try to do things on stage that I think the audience would enjoy. And I try to draw on and add to acts that I’ve enjoyed watching.
BO BURNHAM

Add Thinking Trying
The average person has one Fallopian tube.
BO BURNHAM

Average Person Tube
Where are all the sour patch parents?
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor Parent
I never said I was funny, OK, so stop staring at me.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Said Staring Stop
If comedy is about surprises, about tension, there’s a lot of tension and surprise there, in the fact that people are expecting this to be natural.
BO BURNHAM

Comedy Facts People
Was Einstein’s theory good? Relatively.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor Theory
I think the love-hate is fundamental. Everyone hates reality television, and everyone’s watching it. Everyone hates Facebook, and everyone is on it.
BO BURNHAM

Hate Love Person Reality Thinking
For fifteen cents a day you can feed an African, they eat pennies.
BO BURNHAM

Fifteen Funny Humor
I actually wrestled in high school. I was only in one match, and I lost… my virginity.
BO BURNHAM

Funny Humor School
The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.
BO BURNHAM

Firsts Forever Wikipedia
Postmodern comedy doesn’t work well with very old audiences, because it’s making fun of the comedy they enjoy.
BO BURNHAM

Comedy Enjoy Fun

And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.

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And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de France.

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Popular Authors

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