Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
BILLY CRYSTALI never stopped believing in us and I never felt like I was wanting for anything, except for my father, and that was not going to be. I describe in the book [that] I don’t think I ever felt young again in that way.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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The inspiration was this great group of 40 or 50 relatives, sometimes for Thanksgiving or Passover or something and my brothers would just go up and make them laugh.
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That’s why that show, no matter who hosts it, it really should be a fast-thinking comedian who is really quick on their feet that can handle situations that happen, or somebody with that kind of mentality that can capitalize on something.
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You have to always remember they’re not your own kids. Play with them, love them, spoil them to death – then hand them back.
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Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
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We were in front of a live audience and I would be acting with the man who was playing my lover, and we used those words, and the audience would titter and laugh, and make me uncomfortable doing the scenes. …
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You really have to have some muscle to be on the stage in front of the world.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
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From the first time I saw Sid Caesar be funny I knew that’s what I had to do.
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I started examining history and then everything related to the theater. History, art, all the other studies, if I could link them into the theater, then it became alive for me. It just opened up my eyes.
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Kids need a happy household. They need to be loved and supported in their dreams. And I don’t think you can make your kids’ dreams your own. They need you to support them in their dreams.
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That’s the thing about jazz: it’s free flowing, it comes from your soul.
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I used to limp around my neighborhood imitating him. I did my Bar Mitzvah with an Oklahoma drawl.
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When we had the girls, my daughter Jenny gave us like a Bible from my daughter of, “Don’t feed them this; don’t feed them that, if she says this, don’t say that,” It was crazy!
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I love doing it [hosting the Oscars] because I love the danger of it and you have to come through and think on your feet.
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Change is such hard work.
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