Sometimes there’s a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I’ve ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the pinnacle of that tack.
BILLY CONNOLLYA mate of mine has just told me he’s shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said “her brothers got a moustache!”
More Billy Connolly Quotes
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I’d always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.
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Killing a guy and stealing his wife and child isn’t too nice a thing to do.
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If you give people a chance, they shine.
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didn’t even know there were specialist zombie magazines and clubs. I heard the other day that a radio station had asked people if they`d made preparations for an attack by zombies, and a staggering number of people replied yes!
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In Mexico, everything on the menu is the same dish. The only difference is the way it’s folded.
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Paddy was in the delivery room when the midwife handed him a black baby. “Is this yours?” she asked “probably” said Paddy “she burns everything else”
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The religion in Scotland is one of the most patronising things… after the weather.
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When you involved in an accident and someone asks “are you alright?” Yes fine thanks, I’ll just pick up my limbs and be off.
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I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.
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It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he’s telling them all different things.
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American sex shops are the most bizarre. They sell these inflatable dolls, but they also sell just the head — supposedly for people to drive along the highway with.
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As soon as I got successful, the Scottish press started picking on me. It’s something they reserve just for me.
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I always look skint. When I buy a Big Issue, people take it out of my hand and give me a pound.
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Try to live in a place you like.
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If I had a hammer, there’d be no more folksingers.
BILLY CONNOLLY