As soon as I got successful, the Scottish press started picking on me. It’s something they reserve just for me.
BILLY CONNOLLYAs soon as I got successful, the Scottish press started picking on me. It’s something they reserve just for me.
BILLY CONNOLLYA well-balanced person has a drink in each hand.
BILLY CONNOLLYA fart is just your arse applauding.
BILLY CONNOLLYI used to have Mad Cow’s disease, but I’m alright Nooooooooow.
BILLY CONNOLLYI worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning. … That can keep me awake for days.
BILLY CONNOLLYI used to be a folk singer, but I was… dreadful. I had a voice like a goose farting in the fog.
BILLY CONNOLLYI set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.
BILLY CONNOLLYI was brought up a Catholic, for that you get an A level in guilt.
BILLY CONNOLLYI love Scotland and I speak about it a lot, so people think I’m desperate to go back. They just take it upon themselves to say I’m going back, but I’m not. I’d rather concentrate on becoming a citizen of the world.
BILLY CONNOLLYI’m a big fan of the Mars Bar Diet. You don’t eat the Mars bar, you stick it up your arse and let a rottweiler chase you home.
BILLY CONNOLLYIf you want to lose a bit of weight, don’t eat anything out of a bucket.
BILLY CONNOLLYThere’s nothing better than a fight, especially when you’re watching it from a safe place. You can yell encouragement! Hit him with the left, he’s a big Jessie!
BILLY CONNOLLYWhen I read ‘Be real, don’t get caught acting,’ I thought, ‘How the hell do you do that?’.
BILLY CONNOLLYThe more you know the less the better.
BILLY CONNOLLYWhen people say “it’s always the last place you look”. Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you’ve found it?
BILLY CONNOLLYI just believe in the movie. I don’t care what the book was like. I don’t care what the previous film was like or other films were like. I care only about the script I’ve got.
BILLY CONNOLLY