If you can’t control your peanut butter, you can’t expect to control your life.
BILL WATTERSONSomeday, I’d like to meet that little boy… and tell him the awful TRUTH ABOUT THIS PLACE!! Calvin’s Dad: Calvin, be quiet and eat the stupid Lima beans.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He’s one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!
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Calvin: Isn’t it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor? When you think about it, it’s weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity.
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Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery – it recharges by running.
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I asked mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn’t have paid for me.
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Does anything we say or do in here really matter? Have we done anything important? Have we been happy? Have we made the most of these precious few footsteps?
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The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive.
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Tomorrow we’ll not only seize the day, we’ll throttle it.
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So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?
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Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.
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And it will be even more exciting if anyone pays for them. It’s hard to charge admission without a gate.
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Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.
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I think of football as a sport the way ducks think of hunting as a sport.
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They say the secret of success is being at the right place at the right time, but since you never know when the right time is going to be, I figure the trick is to find the right place and just hang around.
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Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I’m cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.
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Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.
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