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God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.

Bill Watterson

I let my mind wander and it didn’t come back.
BILL WATTERSON

Bumper Funny Mind Sticker Wander
Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.
BILL WATTERSON

Peace Play War
The world of a comic strip ought to be a special place with its own logic and life… I don’t want the issue of Hobbes’s reality settled by a doll manufacturer.
BILL WATTERSON

Issues Reality Special
Buttons … check. Dials … check. Switches … check. Little colored lights … check.
BILL WATTERSON

Buttons Funny Light
Having an enviable career is one thing. Being a happy person is another
BILL WATTERSON

Careers Happy Person
I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.
BILL WATTERSON

Littles Nice People
What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!
BILL WATTERSON

Cheat Game Idiotic Lose Play Sneaky Some Undermanned
I’m a misunderstood genius.” “What’s misunderstood?” “Nobody thinks I’m a genius.
BILL WATTERSON

Genius Misunderstood Thinking
Barney’s Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said “Eat your peas.” Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar Barney’s Mom never found out where he’d gone, Cause Barney didn’t tell her. T
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Mom Peas Plan Sorry
Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
BILL WATTERSON

Dance Hard Maybe Number Special Tell
Who was the guy who first looked at a cow and said ‘I think I’ll drink whatever comes out of these when I squeeze ’em?
BILL WATTERSON

Guy Humorous Look Thinking
What’s the point of wearing your favorite rocket ship underpants if nobody ever asks to see ’em?
BILL WATTERSON

Point Rockets Ships Wearing
I’d like to see cartoonists measuring their work by higher standards than how many papers their strips are in and how much money they make.
BILL WATTERSON

Higher Paper Standards
History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.
BILL WATTERSON

Direction Events Knowable Order Prejudice
I’ve got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.
BILL WATTERSON

Common Ignore Plenty Sense
Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! …Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.
BILL WATTERSON

Enough Undead Zombie

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.

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God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Watterson Quotes