“Tomorrow we’ll not only seize the day, we’ll throttle it.”

We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.

You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!

It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.

I don’t think you’ve ever invited me to… Calvin’s Mom: Calvin, what are you doing? Calvin: Nothing, Mom. Go away. Calvin’s Mom: You’re contagious! You can’t have anyone over to play!

I asked mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn’t have paid for me.

The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that’s even worse

Reading goes faster if you don’t sweat comprehension.

Scientific Progress goes boink?

At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you’ll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.

[Calvin, who has the chicken pox, calls Susie on the telephone.] Susie: Hello? Calvin: Hi, Susie! It’s me, Calvin! I was wondering if you’d like to come over and play. Susie: Why, sure! Boy,

Calvin: Look, a dead bird! Hobbes: It must’ve hit a window. Calvin: Isn’t it beautiful? It’s so delicate. Sighhh… once it’s too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is.

That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.

History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.

We all have different desires and needs, but if we don’t discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled.

You can drag my body to school but my spirit refuses to go.

That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

At the end of the day, I just do my job. I love my art.

Glorify who you are today, do not condemn who you were yesterday, and dream of who you can be tomorrow.

I’m really big on day dates. If you go for a stroll, have a picnic or lunch with a glass of wine – it doesn’t get better than that.

I did rocks, all this dumb stuff. But now it’s just trying to stay afloat and just get through the days.

We should round every day of stirring action with an evening of thought. We learn nothing of our experience except we muse upon it.

Every day I discover more and more beautiful things. It’s enough to drive one mad. I have such a desire to do everything, my head is bursting with it.

Everyone who has run knows that its most important value is in removing tension and allowing a release from whatever other cares the day may bring.

If the Qur’an was the word of God, it had been dictated on a very bad day.