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I’d…bet enthusiasm for ‘ethnic cleansing’ will wane if only sticks and rocks are available for the warring parties.

Bill Hicks

Just one thing I know for sure, chicks dig jerks.
BILL HICKS

Chicks Jerk Knows
How would you like to get inside that guy’s mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn’t he?
BILL HICKS

Around Glance Guy Look
Let me tell you about gays in the military. I don’t want any gay people hanging around me while I’m killing kids. I just don’t want to see it.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Military
I was over in Australia during Easter, which was really interesting. You know, they celebrate Easter the exact same way we do, commemorating the death and resurrection of Jesus by telling our children that a giant bunny rabbit left chocolate eggs in the night.
BILL HICKS

Bunny Celebrating Commemorating Easter Jesus Kings
I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Mean
You ever seen somebody do that? I’ve seen someone do that. Let me tell you something – if you’re smoking out of a hole in your neck [mimics it again] I’d think about quitting. And that’s just me, ya know.
BILL HICKS

Big Fear Quitting Smoke Something Think
People often ask me where I stand politically. It’s not that I disagree with Bush’s economic policy or his foreign policy, it’s that I believe he was a child of Satan sent here to destroy the planet Earth. Little to the left.
BILL HICKS

Children Believe Earth Left Little People
People in the United Kingdom and outside the United States share my bemusement with the United States that America doesn’t share with itself.
BILL HICKS

Country People United States
To make marijuana against the law is like saying God made a big mistake.
BILL HICKS

Marijuana Mistake Weed
I’m a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.
BILL HICKS

Funny Humor Two
Isn’t that weird, we’ve made nature against the law. That’s how un-natural we’ve become.
BILL HICKS

Law Made Natural
How are we gonna justify arms dealing when we realize that we’re all one?
BILL HICKS

Arm Justify Ones Realize
I figure, if he could overcome being nailed to a cross, I don’t think a Marlboro Light’s gonna faze him that much.
BILL HICKS

Light Marlboro Overcome The Figure Think
I’ll tell you how to solve this abortion thing…Those unwanted babies…? Leave about 12 of them on the Supreme Court steps.
BILL HICKS

Abortion Baby Steps Unwanted
Surgeon General’s warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.
BILL HICKS

Cancer Disease Heart Seriously
I’m just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious.
BILL HICKS

Collective Ego Trying Unconscious

I’d…bet enthusiasm for ‘ethnic cleansing’ will wane if only sticks and rocks are available for the warring parties.

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I’d…bet enthusiasm for ‘ethnic cleansing’ will wane if only sticks and rocks are available for the warring parties.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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