I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.
BILL HICKSI’m a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.
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When you’re…stepping over a guy on the sidewalk…does it ever occur to you to think, ‘Wow. Maybe our system doesn’t work?’
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Mister, I don’t want no trouble. I just came downtown here to get some hard rock candy for my kids, some gingham for my wife. I don’t even know what gingham is, but she goes through about ten rolls a week of that stuff. I ain’t looking for no trouble, Mister.
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Marijuana: a drug that kills … no one – and let’s put it in a time frame – ever. Illegal.
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Surgeon General’s warning ought to read: Smoking has been determined t0 cause cancer, heart disease & rednecks with seniority.
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In Australia…they celebrate Easter the same…by telling our children a giant bunny rabbit…left chocolate eggs in the night
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Truly, the only stupid people I’ve ever met, the most absolutely clueless, are the very people that produce television.
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You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: “Iraq: incredible weapons – incredible weapons.” How do you know that? “Uh, well… we looked at the receipts.”
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It’s an insane world, and I’m proud to be a part of it.
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In the beginning God created the heavans and the earth… see you at the final.
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What before seemed a…frustrating wall, the comic deftly and fearlessly steps through, proving the absurdity of it all.
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I love talking about the Kennedy assasination. The reason I do is because I’m fascinated by it. I’m fascinated that our government could lie to us so blatantly, so obviously for so long, and we do absolutely nothing about it. I think that’s interesting in what is ostensibly a democracy.
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It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.
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STRATFORD SUCKS!’ Am I supposed to run after these guys? I’d just stand there, you know. They’d back up. ‘STRATFORD SUCKS! …STRATFORD SUCKS!’ I’d say, ‘I know. I go there. You’re wasting gas, man.
BILL HICKS -
As long as one person lives in darkness then it seems to be a responsibility to tell other people.
BILL HICKS







