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Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day.” Yeah, looks like he rushed it.

Bill Hicks

You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: “Iraq: incredible weapons – incredible weapons.” How do you know that? “Uh, well… we looked at the receipts.”
BILL HICKS

Country Funny Humor Intelligence War
God has this…hobby. He creates perfection. This world is not perfect. We have to learn to separate illusions from reality.
BILL HICKS

Hobbies Perfect Reality
Jesus-murdered. Martin Luther King-murdered. Gandhi-murdered. Malcolm X-murdered. Reagan-wounded.
BILL HICKS

Jesus Murder
You ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really un-evolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day”. Yeah, looks like He rushed it
BILL HICKS

Believe Creation Eye People Real
The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love, instead, see all of us as one.
BILL HICKS

Doors Eye Gun Instead One
The role of the comedian is to say ‘Wait a minute’ when a consensus starts to form.
BILL HICKS

Comedian Roles Starts Waiting
I began working quite young, writing, growing, maturing, always striving to top myself – to make people laugh hard at things they know and believe deep in their hearts to be true.
BILL HICKS

Believe Deep Heart Writing
People say to me, Hey, Bill, the war made us feel better about ourselves. Really? What kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?
BILL HICKS

Better Esteem Feel Self War
How would you like to get inside that guy’s mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn’t he?
BILL HICKS

Around Glance Guy Look
I go to dance clubs…about once a year just to justify the other 364 days I spend in my apartment going ‘God, what idiots!’
BILL HICKS

Apartment Clubs Idiots Years
We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.
BILL HICKS

Creative Creativity Evolution
I believe it is our own misperceptions of who we really are that leads to every self-created hell you’ll find in this world.
BILL HICKS

Believe Created Self World
All day long you see those commercials: ‘Here’s Your Brain, Just Say No’…and the next commercial is: ‘This Bud’s For You.’
BILL HICKS

Brain Bud Commercial Long
We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
BILL HICKS

Growing Ideas Revolutionary Thumbs
This Bud’s for yooouuuu.” C’mon, everybody, let’s be hypocritical bastards. It’s okay to drink your drug. We meant those other drugs. Those untaxed drugs. Those are the ones that are bad for you.
BILL HICKS

Bad Drug Everybody Hypocritical Okay One
I figure, if he could overcome being nailed to a cross, I don’t think a Marlboro Light’s gonna faze him that much.
BILL HICKS

Light Marlboro Overcome The Figure Think

Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day.” Yeah, looks like he rushed it.

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Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day.” Yeah, looks like he rushed it.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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