I smoke to fill the potholes in my soul
BILL HICKSWhat kind of people are these with such low self-esteem that they need a war to feel better about themselves?
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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I’ll smoke, I’ll cough, I’ll get the tumors, I’ll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]
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A Christian will say… “I believe God created me in one day” Yeah, looks liked He rushed it.
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I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. OK, not the most popular idea ever expressed. Either that or you’re all real high and agreeing with me in the only way you can right now. (Starts blinking)
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I’ll tell you how to solve this abortion thing…Those unwanted babies…? Leave about 12 of them on the Supreme Court steps.
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I don’t get along with anything, I really don’t…I’m, I’m, maybe I’m just a, you know, incredibly tasteful human being.
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I believe we all have the Voice of Reason inside us…to gently lead us out of our own self-created hells.
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BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You’re not a human being until you’re in my phone book.
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I’m sorry if any of you are Catholic. I’m not sorry if you’re offended, I’m actually just sorry by the fact that you’re Catholic.
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I believe that the Bible is the literal word of God. And I say no, it’s not, Dad. Well, I believe that it is. Well, you know, some people believe they’re Napoleon. That’s fine. Beliefs are neat. Cherish them, but don’t share them like they’re the truth.
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May I suggest, instead of a war to feel better about yourself, perhaps… sit-ups? Maybe a fruit cup? Eight glasses of water a day?
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I can’t watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.
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I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.
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We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
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If I thought the Jews killed God, I’d worship the Jews.
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People always snap and think they’re Jesus. How come no one ever snaps and thinks they’re Buddha?
BILL HICKS