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The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.

Angela Duckworth

Really, what matters in the long run is sticking with things and working daily to get better at them.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Better Daily Long Matter Really Run Stick Work
Nobody gets to be good at something without effort, no matter what your aptitude is.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Aptitude Effort Get Good Matter Nobody Something
Striving is exhausting. Sometimes I do say things like, ‘I wish I were not quite this driven to be excellent.’ It’s not a comfortable life. It’s not relaxed. I’m not relaxed as a person. I mean, I’m not unhappy. But… it’s the opposite of being comfortable.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Excellent Exhausting Life Quite Say Something Striving Thing Wish
Longitudinal studies following thousands of people across time have shown that most people only begin to gravitate toward certain vocational interests, and away from others, around middle school.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Across Follow Longitudinal Middle People Thousand School Shown Study Time
I define talent as the rate at which you get better at something when you try. To be very talented means you get better faster and more easily than other people or other things that you try.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Better Define Rate Something Talent Try
I think the very idea of character, of developing not just grit, but empathy and curiosity, emotional intelligence.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

But Character Develop Emotion Empathy Idea Intelligence Think
I stayed for lunch for extra tutoring, gave kids my cell phone, and was available. In my first year of teaching,
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Available Extra Kid Lunch Phone Stay Teaching Tutoring
I know a lot of CEOs who are looking for three- to four-year varsity athletes – not necessarily because these people are going to be doing pushups or spiking volleyballs in the workplace, but because they’re looking for that continuity, that person who was gritty about something.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Athlete CEO Four Know Look People Pushup So Spiking Three Varsity Volleyball Year
I worked hard as a teacher. But those are completely different career paths. And the lack of direction is why I didn’t get far enough in any of those things.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Career Completly Direction Enough Harder Path Teacher Thing Work
There haven’t been genetic studies on grit, but we often think that challenge is inherited but grit is learned. That’s not what science says. Science says grit comes from both nature and nurture.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Challenge Genetic Girl Inherited Learn Science Studies
Many, many individuals will report starting to form their lifelong interests around adolescence. Why that is, researchers don’t fully know. But if you can take a trip down memory lane and see what interested you, that’s at least a clue as to where your interest may begin to develop.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Adolescence Around Individual Interest Lifelong Many Report Start
The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Also Good Grit Most Parent Style Thing
What we reliably find is that people’s perseverance scores are actually higher than their passion scores, and I think it really does get to the fact that working hard is hard, but maybe finding your passion is even more difficult.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Consult Demand Job Management More People Perseverance Reliability Teach
Being gritty doesn’t mean not showing pain or pretending everything is O.K. In fact, when you look at healthy and successful and giving people, they are extraordinarily meta-cognitive. They’re able to say things like, ‘Dude, I totally lost my temper this morning.’ That ability to reflect on yourself is signature to grit.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Being Everything Fact Give Gritty Healthy Look Mean OK People Pretend Show Successful
Grit and self-control are related, but they’re not the same thing.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Control Grit Relate Same Self Thing
Some people prefer a world where we’re all equally talented in everything. Whether you prefer that world or not, I don’t think that world exists.
ANGELA DUCKWORTH

Everything People Prefer Some Talent Wally World

The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.

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The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.

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