Maybe. But the reality is that our early interests are fragile, vaguely defined, and in need of energetic, years-long cultivation and refinement.
ANGELA DUCKWORTHPeople who are really gritty – they’re still interested.
More Angela Duckworth Quotes
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I think the questions on the grit scale about not letting setbacks disappoint you, finishing what you begin, doing things with focus, I think that those are things I would aspire to or hope for for all our children.
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Nobody gets to be good at something without effort, no matter what your aptitude is.
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The parenting style that is good for grit is also the parenting style good for most other things: Be really, really demanding, and be very, very supportive.
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Many things matter other than our measured intelligence, so let’s get to work on them.
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Is it ‘a drag’ that passions don’t come to us all at once, as epiphanies, without the need to actively develop them?
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Why do some people try, try again, and why do some people not? That’s what I’m after.
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So when my daughter told me on the second track meet that she was done with it because she discovered she didn’t like competing, I made her finish the season.
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Some people prefer a world where we’re all equally talented in everything. Whether you prefer that world or not, I don’t think that world exists.
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Most people who are really, enduringly interested in something eventually find that it’s important, too – and important to other people.
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I worked hard when I was a consultant. I worked hard when I was in graduate school looking at neuroscience.
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Grit may carry risk because it’s about putting all your eggs in one basket, to some extent.
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I ended up doubling the math time that a conventional school would have. But I don’t think any of these things were path-breaking or unusual.
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If the quality and quantity of continuous effort toward goals matters as much as I think it does, we may actually get more productive, not less, as we get older – even if we can’t pull all-nighters like we used to.
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To me, the most shocking thing about grit is how little we know, how little science knows, about building it.
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I worked hard as a teacher. But those are completely different career paths. And the lack of direction is why I didn’t get far enough in any of those things.
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The words that we use I think are symbolic of the values that we hold.
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And I’ve discovered a strikingly consistent pattern: grit and age go hand in hand. Sixty-somethings tend to be grittier, on average, than fifty-somethings, who are in turn grittier than forty-somethings, and so on.
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My dad was not super-intentional in his parenting. He was very self-absorbed. I won’t say mean or selfish per se, but very self-absorbed. I think he was just thinking out loud.
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People’s lives really do turn out differently. And it certainly can’t be explained by how intelligent you remember them being when they were sitting next to you in organic chemistry class.
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I would be surprised if my girls ended up as women without grit. I really would.
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I stayed for lunch for extra tutoring, gave kids my cell phone, and was available. In my first year of teaching,
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Some of the things we do are great, but they often have these iterations that are not great. We screw up sometimes. We get rejected.
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Really, what matters in the long run is sticking with things and working daily to get better at them.
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Being gritty doesn’t mean not showing pain or pretending everything is O.K. In fact, when you look at healthy and successful and giving people, they are extraordinarily meta-cognitive. They’re able to say things like, ‘Dude, I totally lost my temper this morning.’ That ability to reflect on yourself is signature to grit.
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Psychologists call this the maturity principle. My own life experience fits this principle to a T.
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If you’re never able to tolerate a little bit of pain and discomfort, you’ll never get better.
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