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I’m known for being an up, high-energy, and optimistic kind of guy.

Al Yankovic

I’m always a little leery about doing shows where I’m not the headliner because when I first started playing in 1982 I opened for Missing Persons and got pelted for 45 minutes.
AL YANKOVIC

Always Decision Do Headline Leery Little Miss People Play Point Show Start
As a kid, I certainly never thought I would get to spend my life doing something fun.
AL YANKOVIC

Certain Do Fun Kid Something Spend Thought
The music has always been my bread and butter, and I’ve focused more of my attention on that.
AL YANKOVIC

Always Attention Bread Butter Focus Music
If I could find the right kind of property, get tied in with the right movie, I’d love to be involved, but I just find it hard to be motivated to do another screenplay right now.
AL YANKOVIC

Another Find Involve Just Kind Motivate Movie Property Right Screenplay Tie
I think that was the genesis of my polka medleys, because every rock song I played on the accordion just sounded like a polka and my friends thought it was funny.
AL YANKOVIC

Friend Funny Genesis Medley Polka Rock Song Soun Think
If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.
AL YANKOVIC

Avoid Discuss Heat Paper Political Politics Religion Toilet
That’s something the kids should know about. Reading is a gateway to witchcraft and lesbianism.
AL YANKOVIC

Gateway Kid Lesbian Read Something Witchcraft
I know I’m a million times as humble as thou art!
AL YANKOVIC

Art Humble Know Million Time
So that’s why one of my rules of parody writing is that it’s gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit.
AL YANKOVIC

Funny Gotta Know Material Merit Parody Regard Rule Source Write
My velvet Elvis means the world to me. Although he may not be worth much dough, he means more to me than some old Rembrandt or Van Gogh.
AL YANKOVIC

Although Dough Mean Some Velvet World Worth
So then why get upset if somebody like me Tries to look at the world just a bit differently?
AL YANKOVIC

Differently Kind Somebody Thing Tries Upset
I’m a music fan, and I can listen to the radio, or music, without thinking, “How am I going to screw this up?” [Laughs] If I’m really actively trying to think of a parody, then I’ll have my antenna out, and be a little more proactive about it.
AL YANKOVIC

Fan Go Laugh Radio Screw Think Try
I don’t want to pooh-pooh modern pop. I appreciate that as well, but my personal favorite kind of music is guitar-based rock. I like grunge and garage bands and alternative music, but that’s more my personal taste.
AL YANKOVIC

Appreciate Favorite Guitar Kind Modern Music Personal Pooh Pop
I’m watching the charts every week and hoping something will pop into my head.
AL YANKOVIC

Chart Head Hope Pop Something Watch Week Will
Kind of wish I was dead. Maybe, I’ll blow my brains out, mama, or maybe I’ll go bowling.
AL YANKOVIC

Blow Brain Kind Mama Maybe Suicide Wish
Whereas if I wrote a movie script, chances are better than even that I’d just be another guy in L.A. with a movie script in his drawer.
AL YANKOVIC

Another Better Chance Drawer Guy Movie Script
I mean, I hate to gloat, but I’m extremely satisfied with my position in life and the way things have worked out for me.
AL YANKOVIC

Extremely Gloat Hate Life Mean Opposition Out Satisfy Thing Work
I don’t watch a lot of other people’s parodies because I don’t want to be unduly influenced.
AL YANKOVIC

Influence People Unduly Watch
Buy our album, were Nirvana, a garage band from Seattle. Well, it sure beats raising cattle.
AL YANKOVIC

Album Band Bet Cattle Garage Nirvana Our Raise Seattle Sure
There are probably a few library fines I haven’t paid yet, but I’m a pretty clean-cut guy overall.
AL YANKOVIC

Cut Fine Guy Library Overall Paid Pretty Probably
He put Ben Gay inside my jock strap and filled my tooth paste tube up with glue.
AL YANKOVIC

Gay Inside Jock Paste Revenge Strap Tooth Tube
They somehow didn’t see the need for an accordion player. That’s when I realized that I had to find my own path in life.
AL YANKOVIC

According Life Need Own Path Player Realize Somehow
It fit pretty nicely into my schedule because we’d pretty much finished the bulk of promotion for Mandatory Fun and were just getting geared up for the World Tour so this was a nice time for me to be working on it.
AL YANKOVIC

Bulk Finish Fit Mandatory Nicely Pretty Promotion Scheule
There aren’t that many superstars around anymore.
AL YANKOVIC

Anyone Around Many Superstar
You make me wanna staple bagels to my face, then remove them with a pitchfork.
AL YANKOVIC

Bagel Face Pitchfork Remove Staple Wanna
I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.
AL YANKOVIC

Esteem Hockey Little Lost Made Self Team
What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist’s performance on whether or not they had a good seat?
AL YANKOVIC

Artist Attention Austin Kind More Music

I’m known for being an up, high-energy, and optimistic kind of guy.

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I’m known for being an up, high-energy, and optimistic kind of guy.

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