“I guess I lost a little bit of self-esteem that time that you made it with the whole hockey team.”

I can bend paper clips into the shapes of small animals.

You fake something until you’re good at it.

I’m an ugly girl, My face makes you hurl, Sad I have it, I should bag it. Acne everywhere, Unwanted facial hair. I’m a relation to Frankenstein’s creation.

Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.

You slammed my face down on the barbecue grill, now my scars are all healing, but my heart never will.

Whenever I do a parody it’s not meant to make you hate anybody’s music really.

It was difficult to get into my friends’ rock bands when I was a teenager.

Whereas if I wrote a movie script, chances are better than even that I’d just be another guy in L.A. with a movie script in his drawer.

I’ve always enjoyed animation and voiceover work. That’s something that I’ve been proactive about.

People never ask people doing serious music, ‘Do you ever think about doing funny music?’

A lot of my cartoon voices are basically just variations on my natural voice.

There aren’t that many superstars around anymore.

I’m watching the charts every week and hoping something will pop into my head.

I don’t watch a lot of other people’s parodies because I don’t want to be unduly influenced.

Until you came along I never dated anyone this low on the food chain.

The irony is of course that my career has lasted a whole lot longer than some of the people I’ve parodied over the years.

My best friend had a hockey scholarship at Ohio State, so I would get a couple of pairs at the beginning of the season and send them down to him. They practised two hours a day. He’d skate in them for three weeks then ship them back.

Sometimes people ask, ‘Are hockey fights real?’ I say, ‘If they weren’t, I’d get in more of them.

One of the key qualities that you need to be a great hockey player is fantastic anticipation and feel for the game – if you know where the puck is going before it is hit, that is half the battle.

I love everything about hockey.

I don’t like my hockey sticks touching other sticks, and I don’t like them crossing one another, and I kind of have them hidden in the corner. I put baby powder on the ends. I think it’s essentially a matter of taking care of what takes care of you.

I grew up such a fan. It was my life. Everything I did was hockey related and everything I have is because of hockey and the NHL.

I wasn’t naturally gifted in terms of size and speed; everything I did in hockey I worked for, and that’s the way I’ll be as a coach.

And people who know me would tell you that away from hockey I’m really not that competitive.