If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it’d be a travesty.
AL FRANKENYou see, they love America like a 4-year-old loves his mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a 4-year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad.
More Al Franken Quotes
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Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum.
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The nature of the Internet and the importance of net neutrality is that innovation can come from everyone.
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Being a comedian, you’re under pressure. You have to deal with stress and pressure to perform – to deal with pressure without stress.
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Asking the question whether the mainstream media has a liberal or conservative bias is like asking whether al Qaeda uses too much oil in their hummus.
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The Fourth Amendment doesn’t apply to corporations.
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My mom sold real estate and did it part time.
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I’m a perfectionist and if I start making changes, I’ll never stop.
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In our political system, money is power. And that means a few can have a lot more power than the rest.
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The thing that interests me least about the radio business is the radio business. But I’ve had to learn a little bit about it. It’s not rocket science: You get ratings, that’s good.
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They’re about getting ratings, about making money, about doing stories that are easy to cover.
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You know, Lincoln was funny. I don’t think F.D.R. was very funny. But Lincoln was funny. Lincoln was really funny. But I think you should get elected first, and then show that you’re funny.
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Bill Clinton is the greatest president of the 20th century because I played touch football with him.
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As someone who’s spent time with our troops in Iraq and Afghanistan on USO tours and met wounded warriors at Walter Reed and Bethesda,
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The news movement conservatives that are just laying out, slathering out the disinformation and the lies, as I discuss in my book, ‘Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right.’
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The crash of 2008 was driven in no small part by unfair practices in the mortgage industry which led to many consumers being trapped in loans they didn’t understand and couldn’t afford.
AL FRANKEN