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The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.

Al Franken

For 35 years I was a writer. I wrote a lot of jokes. Some of them weren’t funny. Some of them weren’t appropriate. Some of them were downright offensive. I understand that.
AL FRANKEN

Appropriate Downright Funny Joke Offensive Some Thirty-five Understand Writer Wrote Year Years
Russia has cultivated an opaque network of patronage across the region that it uses to influence and direct decision- making.
AL FRANKEN

Across Country Cultivated Decioison Direct Influence Influencer Making Network Region User
Call-time has renewed my faith in the need for public financing of elections. Call-time is where I as the candidate, sit in a room with my “call-time manager,” and a phone. Then I call people and ask them for money. For hours. Apparently, I’m really good at it.
AL FRANKEN

Ask Call Candidate Election Faith Finance Manage Money Need People Phone Public Renew Room Time
The crash of 2008 was driven in no small part by unfair practices in the mortgage industry which led to many consumers being trapped in loans they didn’t understand and couldn’t afford.
AL FRANKEN

Become Crash Drive Industry led Many Mortgage Part Practice Small Unfair
And when you hit him, he runs to the teacher and says, ‘Teacher, sue him.’
AL FRANKEN

Him Hit Run Say Sue Teacher When
I’m a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I’m invited to all the inaugural balls.
AL FRANKEN

Administration Ball Invite Perk
that is eventually going to have an effect on soldiers and troops who are actually going to believe that and it’s wrong. It’s just wrong.
AL FRANKEN

Actual Believe Effect Eventually Go Soldier Wrong
You have to love your country like an adult loves somebody, not like a child loves its Mommy. And right-wing Republicans tend to love America like a child loves its Mommy, where everything Mommy does is okay.
AL FRANKEN

Adult Child Children Country Like Love Mean Mommy Somebody
I might think they use a little bit too much oil; some people might think it’s a little dry. But the problem with al Qaeda is they want to kill us.
AL FRANKEN

Dry Kill Little might Much Person Problem Think Us Use
At ‘SNL,’ I wrote political stuff, but I never felt the show should have an axe to grind. But when I left in ’95, I could let my own beliefs out.
AL FRANKEN

Axe Belief Felt Grind Left Out Own Political Snow Stuff Wrote
Well, I think that there’s a value to comedy in and of itself.
AL FRANKEN

Comedy Itself Think Value Well
I didn’t realize he meant our nation.
AL FRANKEN

Meant Nation Our Realize
I’m sure I’ve devoted enough thought to Rush Limbaugh for one lifetime.
AL FRANKEN

Devote Enough Lifetime People
Most of us here in the media are what I call infotainers…
AL FRANKEN

Call Here Media Most
I once asked the most fabulous couple I know, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, how they kept things fresh despite having been married for almost seven months. ‘It’s a job, Al,’ Guy told me. ‘We work at it every day.’
AL FRANKEN

Ask Celebrity Couple Despite Fabulous Fresh Job Kep Month Once Seven Thing
It was hard for him to project who he is, the person people know in private.
AL FRANKEN

Hard Him Know People Person Private Project

The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.

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The government must give proper weight to both keeping America safe from terrorists and protecting Americans’ privacy.

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