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I like the liberal tradition; I like the Hubert Humphrey tradition fighting for civil rights.

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The way I see it, I’m not going to Washington to be the 60th Democratic senator. I’m going to Washington to be the second senator from the state of Minnesota.
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As a source of innovation, an engine of our economy, and a forum for our political discourse.
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I’ve spent my entire career being a satirist.
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It’s not preppies, cause I’m a preppie myself. I just don’t like homosexuals. If you ask me, they’re all homosexuals in the Pudding. Hey, I was glad when that Pudding homosexual got killed in Philadelphia.
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Liberals don’t hate America. We love America more than Ann Coulter does. I love it enough to engage my readers honestly.
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I once asked the most fabulous couple I know, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, how they kept things fresh despite having been married for almost seven months. ‘It’s a job, Al,’ Guy told me. ‘We work at it every day.’
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When a company is able to establish a dominant market position, consumers lose meaningful choices.
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In our political system, money is power. And that means a few can have a lot more power than the rest.
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And when you hit him, he runs to the teacher and says, ‘Teacher, sue him.’
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I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.
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