Minnesota has a proud tradition of having two Senators on the Ag committee – a tradition I’d like very much to continue.
AL FRANKENService dogs raise their masters’ sense of well-being.
More Al Franken Quotes
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If someone hacks your password, you can change it – as many times as you want.
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The civil rights movement was very important in my house, and then Vietnam was very important ’cause there were two boys, so I came of age during a very heated political climate.
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There’s an element of that that’s either God-given, a talent that you’re not necessarily responsible for.
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Today I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written “Today I will masterbate–if I want to!
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I get satisfaction when I write something I like, when I’m happy with it.
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We need an investigation, because we don’t know what Donald Trump owes Russia.
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Why don’t we focus on what Afghan women can do? They can cook, bear children, and pray. As I recall, that was fine for our grandmothers.
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If you look at terrorists, they really have no sense of humor.
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Net neutrality has been in place since the very beginning of the Internet.
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Most of us here in the media are what I call infotainers…
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I feel a deep obligation to the men and women who have risked life and limb on our behalf.
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If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it’d be a travesty.
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Bob Dole used to be really funny. Barney Frank can be kind of funny. Bob Kerrey has a good sense of humor.
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I want a president who can handle a cream soda.
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I once asked the most fabulous couple I know, Madonna and Guy Ritchie, how they kept things fresh despite having been married for almost seven months. ‘It’s a job, Al,’ Guy told me. ‘We work at it every day.’
AL FRANKEN