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I’m the kindest, most supportive friend ever, probably to my own detriment, but I hope that I am toughening up a little bit.

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I don’t want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.
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I was born in California, raised a vegetarian, and love science fiction, so don’t tell me how I need to be in order to fit your standards.
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So much of a stand-up’s life is doing live radio and having to be funny and quick on the spot with these strangers, and sort of surgical in terms of how funny I can be in three minutes.
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I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.
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I’ve just got to be myself and hopefully people will find me. And my audience did find me.
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Whereas regular people tend to run away – because the embarrassing story is always going to be the really funny story.
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I always wanted to be as busy as possible so that if one job went away I’d still have plenty of other things to do.
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I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.
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But I think what diversity brings to any daypart is more eyeballs, just more opportunity.
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If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.
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Much like a wobbly toddler or an unhinged politician, one immediately looks for someone else to blame. God. Your parents. Ex-girlfriends. Undocumented immigrants. Marvin in Human Resources. China.
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I started out being a stand up and writing my own material. That took me to Talk Soup, where I was writing and performing for TV.
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I like the company of guys. I have a lot of good girlfriends that I really love, but you know, most of my close friends are men.
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Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.
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“You are going to fail, and anyone who is success has powered through many, many failures.”
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