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Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.

Brendan Behan

An author’s first duty is to let down his country.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Down Firsts Let
When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Fighting Men Two Woman
Ninety-seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Saint Theatre Two Years
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
I saw a notice that said “Drink Canada Dry” and I’ve just started.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Drinking Food
There’s no one, no one, loves you like yourself.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Like Love One Love You
New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Funny Irish People Spiritual
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide
I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinkers Problem Writing
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
Most horror movies are certainly that.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cinema Horror Most
I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Summer Winter
There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny

Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.

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Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.

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