I love you just the way you are but you don’t see you like I do. You shouldn’t try so hard to be perfect. Trust me, perfect should try to be you.
BO BURNHAMAnd if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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I saw a giraffe with a short neck That was sad Or a deer
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I like to inject a bit of production value and flair to comedy, or at least to my little corner of comedy.
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When I see someone filming me, I don’t usually think, ‘No, man, don’t put this up online!’ I’d think, ‘Hey man, you don’t get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!’ I love going to theatre and to shows so much.
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All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.
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I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
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If your belief is hateful towards people, I couldn’t respect that.
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I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don’t have a great ear. It’s like a tragedy – I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.
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The world doesn’t need any more hot chicks or tough guys or smooth talkers – the world needs more you. And don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
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I’d really love to make something that doesn’t involve my stupid face.
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You love the people that give you money and attention? Of course you do, that’s not selfless that you love your fans, that’s ridiculous.
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“Do I really want to make a joke about a miscarriage when a woman in the audience might have had one?” I don’t worship comedy; at the end of the day I don’t fall to the altar of comedy unquestioningly.
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Bitches and hoes don’t exist because the hoes know Bo’s a feminist.
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People give me money and I don’t know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy.
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Quotes are for dumb people who can’t think of something intelligent to say on their own.
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The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever.
BO BURNHAM







