If somebody makes me laugh, I’m his slave for life.
BETTE MIDLERAll these rumors about [Tom Cruise] being gay. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it for one minute. He hasn’t been to one of my shows.
More Bette Midler Quotes
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You have to think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread, but you have to know that you’re not.
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I wish America would spend even half as much time complaining about plastics in our oceans as we do about actresses’ plastic surgery.
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I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!
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You can’t just have a clean public space – you also have to have people willing to use it, and something that will draw them in.
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If you pick up a ukulele, it will make you unbelievably happy.
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I read neither good nor bad about me. I let it not even in my life, so it has no effect on me. I am very sensitive.
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My parents taught me: Do not rely on a man. Not rely on it that you get married and it pays for you. That’s what I figured. I have always paid my own bills.
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From the age of 14 until I was 50, I just got on a treadmill and ran. I never stopped to assess what I was doing or to pat myself on the back.
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People are not the best because they work hard. They work hard because they are the best.
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There’s a kind of emotional exploration you plumb with a friend that you don’t really do with your family.
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it will cleanse itself, and new life forms, maybe better ones, will come. Meanwhile, we’ll have gotten exactly what we deserved: annihilation.
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I’ve always been lucky enough to have great audiences. It has been quite a life.
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I’m confident that I’m as intelligent as many people, but I know that I’m not as intelligent as some. So in the presence of hyperintelligent people, I’m a shrinking violet because I don’t want to look like a fool. I know a little about a lot and a lot about a little.
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I tried to charm the pants off Bob Dylan, but everyone will be disappointed to learn that I was unsuccessful. I got close – a couple of fast feels in the front seat of a Cadillac.
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We’re all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.
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Sometimes, when I wake up, my soul is in another city!
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Some say love it is a river that drowns the tender reeds. Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your heart to bleed. Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need. I say love, it is a flower and you, its only seed.
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I’d make a wonderful Lady Macbeth. I’ll wear a pair of platform shoes or something.
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The first time I saw a picture of [fabled actress] Ethel Barrymore – she was on Broadway and she was wearing pearls. I thought, “That’s who I should grow up to be.” It’s odd, because it was her physical image that I wanted;
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My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors.
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Most people are walking around the city like corpses; they aren’t alive enough to notice the trash. They come from other places and they see it as a big garbage dump.
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I sold my soul to rock ‘n’ roll.
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When you reach a certain age, you have fulfilled your childhood dream and whatever your first or second adulthood led you to do. T
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It is true that in this culture, they throw you out when you get older. I see it all the time, especially in my business. At my age, you’re playing somebody’s mother – and there aren’t even a lot of those roles!
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It’s a different world now: Stars come and go quickly, and there are so many of them. I read a statistic that all the record companies combined used to put out around 3,000 albums in a year. Now they put out something like 30,000!
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GOD is watching us, from a Distance.
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