When I go onstage, I want to relieve your mind, your pressures.
BERNIE MACYou don’t see me in Los Angeles a lot. I go back home. Because I can’t play the game. I can’t – my tolerance – I know I’m getting old; I’ll be 50 this year. And you know how I know I’m getting old? ‘Cause my tolerance level is low.
More Bernie Mac Quotes
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People like rumors. They’re going to say things like, ‘You was at the club with Lil’ Kim, and you and Kanye West got into a fist fight.’ You can’t get upset. You’ve got to keep hope alive.
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I have Glocks, .45s, Berettas, Remingtons. I like the marksmanship and the discipline that it takes to be a gun owner. I like the machinery. Being able to take it out and clean it is even more fascinating than having the gun.
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You have to meet all of the challenges, big and small. Because how you start is how you finish.
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I wasn’t disciplined at all. As good of an athlete as I was, I was not disciplined. Had I had the drive that I have in comedy, and acting, and writing, that’s why I knew it just wasn’t right for me.
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I want to speak directly to the audience, to say, ‘I’m like you – I’m frustrated, I’m not an expert, I don’t have a manual on parenting, I make mistakes, I’m selfish too.’
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The two sides of Bernie – that’s a quiet weapon that I have.
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If I can tell someone a story that makes them bend over and laugh, that’s bigger than anything else.
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I was born October 5, 1957, on the South Side of Chicago, in the Woodlawn area, a neighborhood that hasn’t changed much in forty-five years. Our house was on 66th and Blackstone, but the city tore it down when the rats took over.
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I want people to say at the end of my day, you know, like I used to say about Sidney Poitier and James Cagney and Joan Crawford and Red Skelton and those guys and Bill Cosby. They did quality and substance. You always remember them.
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You know, every time it comes, every time that light comes on or every time that camera comes on, every time that microphone comes on, the Mac Man seek and destroy.
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You can’t be a doctor if you don’t know the entire parts of the body.
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I’m funny. I’m a comedian. I’m not a clown.
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Sometimes when you lose you win, son. Failure is just life’s way of preparing you for success.
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Comedy has been so good to me.
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America…Do not touch my TV, my DVD, my stereo, my dual-deck VCR. Do not touch my old school, my new school, my slow jams, my party jams, my happy rap, and you better not touch…My James Brown.
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Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling is unleaded.
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I know doing movies is where I need to be. That’s where my audience wants to see me.
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Black audiences are hard. They always think they’re better than you. So you got to come with a little extra to satisfy them.
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It’s a pleasure to work with someone who is just as strong as you are.
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You can’t change what happened. Just like you can’t change the future by worrying about it. You just have to keep moving.
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When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars – that’s heaven here on earth.
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I don’t ever watch myself. By watching, you try to perfect yourself, become a robot.
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I want to play a villain – I can’t wait to play a villain.
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I hate to let people down. I was like that in sports and I was like that in comedy. I was like that at work. When I worked General Motors and stuff like that, when I say something, I mean it.
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It took me a long time to get to where I’m at, in my career and as a man. I was going through my trials and tribulations in life, and it gave me the strength to tackle things that have come my way.
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Why I was so intrigued with Red Skelton was because he was able to make you cry and laugh and the same time. That was power.
BERNIE MAC