Everybody in the Middle East wants to explain why they’re right.
P. J. O'ROURKEI like fiction and the kind of history that gives the grace and flavor of fiction to the past. No bloviation on current events, please. I can write that junk myself.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Never wear anything that panics the cat.
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Adam Smith’s huge failure was the fact that he did not foresee the industrial revolution.
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Politics is the attempt to achieve power and prestige without merit.
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We will win an election when all the seats in the House and Senate and the chair behind the desk in the Oval Office and the whole bench of the Supreme Court are filled with people who wish they weren’t there.
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The budget doesn’t have much control over the government. Then again, the government doesn’t have much control over the budget.
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The divorce rate in 1946 was higher than it ever had been and as high as it ever would be until the ’70s. The reason was that prior relationships had not endured the strain of war.
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The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore.
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No industry in living memory has collapsed faster than daily print journalism.
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The C student starts a restaurant. The A student writes restaurant reviews.
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Every vote should carry a serial number, so that responsibility for harmful or careless use of the vote can be traced. Concealed voting should be outlawed.
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There is a simple rule here, a rule of legislation, a rule of business, a rule of life: beyond a certain point, complexity is fraud. You can apply that rule to left-wing social programs, but you can also apply that rule to credit derivatives, hedge funds, all the rest of it.
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Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs.
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Mikhail Gorbachev was the Jimmy Carter of the Communist bloc. The Russians hate him.
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Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have.
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There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.
P. J. O'ROURKE