Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy.
P. J. O'ROURKEYou’re never going to read ‘The Wealth of Nations,’ and you shouldn’t, really. It’s 900 pages.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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If you think health care is expensive now, just wait ’til it’s free.
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Let’s reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools – and use it on the teachers.
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The most brilliant satire of all time was ‘A Modest Proposal’ by Jonathan Swift. You’ll notice how everything got straightened out in Ireland within days of that coming out.
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I come from Toledo, Ohio, a town that has been hurt badly by the shift of the automobile business towards Japan. And yet I remember how the car workers lived in the neighborhood that I grew up in. My father was a car salesman, and I remember how we lived. I remember how modestly we lived.
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You can’t destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America’s elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and about half the time, you’re doing us a favor.
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Term limits aren’t enough. We need jail.
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No humorist is under any obligation to provide answers and probably if you were to delve into the literary history of humour it’s probably all about not providing answers because the humorist essentially says: this is the way things are.
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The 1960s was an era of big thoughts. And yet, amazingly, each of these thoughts could fit on a T-shirt.
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Everybody in the Middle East wants to explain why they’re right.
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Stupid is a great force in human affairs.
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By the end of the 1950s, American cars were so reliable that their reliability went without saying even in car ads. Thousands of them bear testimony to this today, still running on the roads of Cuba though fueled with nationalized Venezuelan gasoline and maintained with spit and haywire.
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I’m old enough to remember when the air over American cities was a lot dirtier than it is now.
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Regulation creates a moral hazard.
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Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.
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My dad died when I was young; my mom remarried with more haste than sense to a fellow… he wasn’t evil or anything, but he was worthless.
P. J. O'ROURKE