Will Generation X and the Millennials do a better job running the world than the boomers have? Let’s hope so.
P. J. O'ROURKENew Hampshire polling data are unreliable because, when you call the Granite State’s registered Republicans and independents in the middle of dinner and ask them who they’re going to vote for, they have a mouth full of mashed potatoes and you can’t understand what they say.
More P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
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Let’s reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools – and use it on the teachers.
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Never fight an inanimate object.
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Sometimes the right response to evil is an appeal to powerful and effective social organization – an appeal to civilization itself.
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of ‘I hate strangers and anything that’s different.’
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Death is so important that God visited death upon his own son, thereby helping us learn right from wrong well enough that we may escape death forever and live eternally in God’s grace.
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I come from Toledo, Ohio, a town that has been hurt badly by the shift of the automobile business towards Japan. And yet I remember how the car workers lived in the neighborhood that I grew up in. My father was a car salesman, and I remember how we lived. I remember how modestly we lived.
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You’re stupid,’ is not something even his most severe critics usually say to President Barack Obama.
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Political systems are run by self-selecting politicians. We don’t draft people; it’s not jury duty.
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A fundamental American question is, ‘What’s the big idea?’
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Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino’s box.
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Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry rights. Politics are a lousy way to get things done. Politics are, like God’s infinite mercy, a last resort.
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The good news is that, according to the Obama administration, the rich will pay for everything. The bad news is that, according to the Obama administration, you’re rich.
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The idea of a stag hunt evokes chivalry – knights in jerkins and hose, ladies on sidesaddles with wimples and billowing dresses, a white stag symbolizing something-or-other, and Robin Hood getting in the way. An actual stag hunt is more like a horseback meeting of a county planning commission.
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Just because a subject is serious doesn’t mean it doesn’t have plenty of absurdities.
P. J. O'ROURKE